The Best Way to Wreck a Relationship

There’s one easy way to wreck a relationship. See how this unravels.

Andrea came home from two days away. As she approached her house, there were construction workers outside and a construction trailer in front. What the heck! Who are these people? What are they doing here? As Andrea pulled into her driveway, she quickly got out of the car, kept her cell phone handy to call the police, and inquired what was going on. She slowed down her quick frantic walking pace and realized the contractors finally came (after 3 months of calling) to fix the siding on her house from major hail damage over nine months ago. She took a deep breath and asked for the person in charge. She stated that she was never notified.

Andrea took another deep breath and said, “Walk me through the already completed work and your next steps.” Everything made sense.

Andrea mentioned she was never notified. The head foreman said, “I thought the office contacted you.” Andrea said, “No, I was never contacted or notified.” Andrea continued to say, “Don’t ever make assumptions. You’ve been working on my property for two days without the homeowner’s awareness. You’re lucky my neighbors didn’t call the police.”

Miguel Ruiz mentions that one of his four agreements is, “Don’t make assumptions.” ’He goes on to state, “Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.”

Whether it’s as simple as a notification, any assumption can lead to anger, frustration, and annoyance. Most failures in relationships come from assumptions. In a romantic relationship, people often get frustrated because someone didn’t do something. What happens is the frustrated person typically fails to ask questions and then makes inaccurate assumptions.

What type of relationships do you want? Fruitful, empathetic and understanding or constant strain and tension?

What’s the lesson in all of this? Have the courage to ask the right questions in any relationship. This will lead to understanding and empathy instead of frustration, blame, and anger.

This week, what questions will you ask to lead to better relationships?

Wishing you an abundant, joyful and prosperous day!

Lora Polowczuk

Chief Energy Officer